The celebration today will mostly revolve around a steady parade of terrific shit to eat as soon as Sam gets home with my Sausage McMuffin, which will be followed immediately by two Russell Stover sugar-free marshmallow pumpkins. Remember ... CONTINUOUS EATING IS THE KEY TO A LONG AND JOYOUS FUTURE. Whoa, I just made that up!
Other parade participants will include Pop Secret with Movie Theater Butter, hot dogs from Five Guys, one of the exquisite My π deep-dish Chicago-style pizzas that arrived on Wednesday in a crate of dry ice, and — last but not least — A BOX OF TWO DOZEN HAND-DECORATED SUGAR-FREE PETIT FOURS arriving this morning from Amazon! Two dozen! Naps will occur as needed between snacks and meals to prevent food-scheduling conflicts and annoying overlap.
Because inquiring minds want to know, I thought you might be interested in this world map indicating all of the Howdygram’s visitors during the last 24 hours plus a nice close-up view of the North America section — just for the hell of it — directly below. I hope you’re impressed by how popular I am. It’s intense, isn’t it?
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