Eating, belching and sleeping. Another perfect Thanksgiving bites the dust.

This had to be Howdygram headquarters’ fastest and most forgettable Thanksgiving on record. After Sam consumed his annual apple pie as an hors d’oeuvres at 2 p.m., we ate our official meal at 3:30, belched for 14 minutes and fell asleep watching Angels in the Outfield (1951) starring Paul Douglas and Janet Leigh. At some point I vaguely remember muttering to Sam about wrapping the rest of the turkey in foil and shoving it in the fridge, and apparently he heard me because that’s where it ended up.

My Thanksgiving also included the following “Black Thursday” happy Internet discoveries: 1) four packages of 50 Freestyle Lite glucose test strips on eBay for $55, which is VERY VERY CHEAP; 2) a copy of Strunk and White’s The Elements of Style on Amazon for one cent; and 3) a tub of assorted sugar-free dark chocolate truffles from Amber Lyn Chocolates on sale at 25% off with free shipping. (Don’t tell Sam, okay? I want to surprise him with the truffles.)

And now I think I’ll shlep myself back into the family room for some leftovers on a paper plate and maybe a bag of Pop Secret. Sam and I hope you and yours are having a happy, digestible holiday!