More specifically, the big toe on my left foot. And I didn’t even realize it at the time. At 2:15, about five minutes after Sam left for work today, I was sitting on the sofa in the family room and bumped my toe on the coffee table. Five minutes later I look down at my foot and I’M COVERED IN BLOOD. Nothing hurts, thank God — my feet are numb due to diabetic neuropathy — but I won’t be able to do much about my crushed nail and the extent of my toe injury until Sam gets home tonight because I’m an old lady with mobility issues. No kidding, people, I’m really freaked out right now. I wanted to load and run the dishwasher this afternoon and maybe do some laundry but I don’t think I should shlep around the house putting any pressure on my toe or risk additional nail damage (if that’s even possible) by stuffing my foot into a slipper.
Just to be safe I made an appointment to see my
podiatrist Thursday morning because diabetics can’t be too careful about lousy toe shit. For your possible interest the map below indicates: A) Howdygram headquarters; and B) my podiatrist’s office at Metroplex Foot & Ankle, which is really as close as it looks. Maybe 60 seconds door-to-door. Am I lucky, or
what?
To sum it up, the current state of my health now includes all of the following: 1) a relapse of cellulitis in my left thigh; 2) another urinary tract infection; 3) an occasional low-grade fever; 4) the aforementioned bloody, battered toe; and 5) a warped fingernail on my right thumb that’s of no real consequence whatsoever.
I’ve just decided to order Chinese for dinner tonight since I can’t think of anything else that would help at a time like this except maybe another nap or sugar-free pudding.
Thank you for reading this. Pass the soy sauce.
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