Monday, October 13, 2014

Christopher Columbus is our latest Putz of the Week.

I’ve got a shocking revelation for you, people. AMERICA’S SCHOOLS DON’T TEACH THE TRUTH ABOUT CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS. He didn’t “discover” the new world ... HE INVADED IT. And for this reason I’d like to announce that Christopher Columbus is the Howdygram’s latest Putz of the Week even though he actually deserves something a whole lot worse. (I’m considering Shithead of the Fifteenth Century.)
In 1492 after Christopher Columbus landed at Hispaniola — an island shared today by the Dominican Republic and Haiti — his obsessive search for gold drove him to the SYSTEMATIC GENOCIDE of 98% of the indigenous peoples through enslavement, torture, mutilation and murder. Natives who didn’t meet their “quota” of gold had their arms hacked off, others were hunted down by hounds, and thousands took poison to end their misery. Of the 300,000 original natives on the island, modern historians estimate that one-third were killed off between 1494 and 1496. In 1508 a census indicates only 60,000 still alive; by 1548 there were barely 500.

While I wouldn’t expect American schools to scare the shit out of eight-year-olds with a story like this, there’s no reason not to tell the truth about Columbus by the time children start high school. At the very least, WE NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING COLUMBUS DAY ALREADY.

Looks like the lying sacks of poo at can claim another defeat ... we didn’t get anywhere near the severe weather they were forecasting for the Dallas metro area overnight [see my previous post] ... and if they actually pre-empted their regular programming to cover this “weather event” LIVE they must have put an awful lot of people to sleep. Right now we have some rain and a few rather low-key thundershowers, but that’s about it. A real yawner.

I guess I’ll try going back to bed now. My work here is done.

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