IRRITATING MEDICAL CRAP. Dr. M’s office called this afternoon to tell me that additional analysis of Tuesday morning’s peepee sample has revealed a much higher level of bacteria than originally suspected, therefore I’m supposed to discontinue the antibiotic I’ve been taking for the last four days for my urinary tract infection — gigantic blue horse capsules called Cefdinir — and pick up a stronger prescription that she just faxed over to CVS. This time it’s Ampicillin 500 mg four times a day for 10 days.
IRRITATING CELEBRITIES WITH NO TALENT. I was glancing through an article on Gawker.com today about Jennifer Lopez when it suddenly occurred to me that I have no idea why this woman is famous. She can’t sing worth a damn and the only movie she ever made that didn’t flop was 17 years ago — Selena — in which she lip-synced SOMEBODY ELSE’S VOCALS. Judging from the endless pictures of this half-naked diva on red carpets I’m assuming all she really knows how to do is POSE, which means she’s just Kim Kardashian with a couple of dance moves. BIG DEAL.
IRRITATING GROCERY STORES. I’m pissed off at the corporate douchebags at Kroger for continuing to allow open-carry ammosexuals to bring fully loaded assault weapons into their stores. You’ll get asked to leave if you walk in with a Big Gulp or you’re not wearing a shirt, but apparently it’s just fine with Kroger to wear an AK-47 strapped on your back. Or, in the case, of dipshit Kory Watkins here in Texas, to actually parade around WITH YOUR FINGER ON THE TRIGGER.
A group called Moms Demand Action for Gun Sense in America has been circulating a petition to get Kroger to ban guns in their stores, stressing that Kroger employees shouldn’t have to determine if the moron with a gun in the frozen food aisle is a dangerous criminal or a local dickhead making a political statement for LIBERTY! JESUS! AMERICA! Personally, if I ever see one of these freaks in a store or restaurant I’ll call 911, notify store security and get the hell out of there.
IRRITATING CELEBRITIES WITH NO TALENT. I was glancing through an article on Gawker.com today about Jennifer Lopez when it suddenly occurred to me that I have no idea why this woman is famous. She can’t sing worth a damn and the only movie she ever made that didn’t flop was 17 years ago — Selena — in which she lip-synced SOMEBODY ELSE’S VOCALS. Judging from the endless pictures of this half-naked diva on red carpets I’m assuming all she really knows how to do is POSE, which means she’s just Kim Kardashian with a couple of dance moves. BIG DEAL.
I have to order some Chinese food now.
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