The Howdygram 2: I wonder if they’ll ever find a starving family in Dallas that wants half-gallon jars of hot Chicago-style giardiniera.

Wednesday, June 27, 2018

I wonder if they’ll ever find a starving family in Dallas that wants half-gallon jars of hot Chicago-style giardiniera.

Shalom and howdy! I woke up exceptionally early today (before 7 a.m.) following a shitty, shitty night with a migraine and nausea that started around 1:30 in the morning. Sam sat up with me in the family room because somebody had to listen to me moan and hold the bowl, right? (I think he eventually just fell asleep on the sofa.)

For the rest of the day I’ve continued to suffer from one of yesterday’s featured ailments: I STILL CAN’T SWALLOW MY FOOD. And I suppose it didn’t help matters any when I started my day with a glorious can of Read’s 3-Bean Salad floating in a lovely sugar/vinegar dressing — surely one of God’s tastiest creations! — but I can’t quite keep it down.

Further down you’ll see what’s on the menu here for dinner tonight [see Le Hospice Gourmet, below] and I fully expect to digest it with no difficulty whatsoever. Please send an email within the next 15 minutes if you’d like to make a reservation. Thank you.

For the last few days Sam has been on a wild and manicky “purge” throughout the house … cleaning and organizing the laundry room, the study and the kitchen, the latter being an effort that ended with transporting huge baskets of unwanted food — in cans, jars and unopened packages — yesterday to the North Texas Food Bank. (I wonder if they’ll ever find a starving family in Dallas that wants half-gallon jars of hot Chicago-style giardiniera.) Because I can’t get up and walk around the house applauding his handiwork, I asked Sam to shoot a few pictures with my iPhone. Three appear here for your possible interest.

At 10 this morning my hospice C.N.A. was here to do bathing and hygiene. She comes three times a week and I love it. There are so many things I can no longer do for myself … it’s awfully hard to believe that basic hygiene is one of them!

Tomorrow (Thursday) at 10 Sam arranged for the hospice social worker, Teresa, to stop by. I’m not exactly sure why, to tell you the truth, but I suspect it has something to do with plans for his five-day caregiver “respite” in September. My hospice service offers Sam some desperately-needed time off — to visit his family and friends in southern California — by transporting me to The Villages at Lake Highlands, a ritzy skilled nursing (and assisted living) facility in Dallas … for free. While I’m not really doing cartwheels about moving into a nursing home for five days, I think it’ll be an interesting opportunity to write Howdygram posts about something new and different. (And I hear the food’s pretty good, too.)

Tonight’s meal at Howdygram headquarters (for me, anyway) will be a box of Stove Top Chicken Stuffing with a jar of Green Giant teeny whole mushrooms in a jar and McCormick instant chicken gravy … and I’m ready to squeal just writing about it! The only thing standing in my way right now is Sam, because he’s sound asleep on the sofa and I don’t know how I’ll ever wake him up before I pass out from hunger.

The world’s best comfort food … Stove Top Stuffing and a jar of teeny whole mushrooms.

It’s actually been quite a while since I’ve asked Sam to make stuffing and mushrooms for me, maybe because life’s been upside-down this year with three hospitalizations, all these people coming and going from Accord Hospice and Palliative Care, my appetite issues and difficulty swallowing food. The swallowing hoo-hah is actually a side effect of diabetic neuropathy, but it’s always something. Jesus.

You may have noticed by now that I’ve been jazzing up the Howdygram with a few thrilling new graphics. I couldn’t tackle projects like this for an awfully long time because I didn’t have access to my iMac workstation or my fancy Adobe Creative Cloud software. All of a sudden, now that Sam moved my iMac into the family room for me, I’m feeling unleashed. THIS IS TERRIFIC! Keep an eye on the Howdygram for even more fantastic upcoming goodies in the future ... okay? For your possible interest, my latest graphics appear below.

I’d like to share a couple of my newest greeting card designs! I uploaded both of these, along with five or six others, to The Howdygram Store this morning. Tomorrow I’ll share some of my new mug designs and assorted other gorgeous whatnots. Tell your friends.