The Howdygram 2: Whether you’re planning a big backyard hoo-hah or just a remembrance, Happy Father’s Day.

Sunday, June 17, 2018

Whether you’re planning a big backyard hoo-hah or just a remembrance, Happy Father’s Day.

It’s Father’s Day today, and although all of you are probably planning something unique to celebrate this holiday with your dad, mine will simply involve remembering, because my dad (Herbie) passed away in July 2002. That’s already 16 years ago! (Oy.) And my sweet father-in-law, Ben, died in 2009.

I don’t have any pictures of dad on my MacBook laptop and won’t have access to my iMac until later this week (when we finally move it to the family room), so I’ll just post a pleasant generic Father’s Day graphic and wish all of you a happy, happy day from the Howdygram.

Actually, I think it’s funny that most Father’s Day graphics include carpentry tools, hammers, nail guns, and whatnot, because MY father was anything but “handy.” His attempt to hang a tie rack in the bedroom closet left a hole in the wall the size of a baseball, and his attempt to hang a garden hose was an equal disaster. Eventually we learned not to ask dad when we had a simple project. We asked mom. She’s the one who taught me how to use a drill, spackle a wall and touch up paint. (Mom also had a fabulous recipe for potato salad.)

We had to call Accord’s emergency number early this morning when I had a huge pee-pee hoo-hah shortly after midnight ... and they immediately sent a hospice R.N. to investigate. So here’s what happened. I’m sitting on the bench next to my chaise lounge, finishing up last night’s Howdygram post, when all of a sudden I had a quick urge to pee … even though I’m catheterized! Pee apparently started to overflow from the catheter tube — enough to soak my nightgown — and when I stood up I continued to leak for a few seconds more. When Sam checked out my tubing he noticed that my pee was traveling in the WRONG DIRECTION, leading both of us to conclude there was an equipment malfunction.

The hospice R.N. (Stella) who dropped in was a delight. She confirmed our conclusion — it was something called an “air lock” that caused my pee to back up like that — and also adjusted the positioning of my internal catheter (didn’t hurt) and checked my vital signs (A-OK). It was about 12:50 a.m. when she finally left, I was still catherized successfully, and there were no additional difficulties whatsoever.

It’s 10:45 a.m., I’m drinking a lovely glass of fruity soda on ice and wondering what time Sam will wake up so maybe I can eat something. In the meantime I’m watching Rio Grande (1950) starring John Wayne and Maureen O’Hara, the third (and last) of John’s Ford’s famous “cavalry trilogy.” In case you’re interested, the others were Fort Apache (1948) and She Wore a Yellow Ribbon (1949). There will be a pop quiz on Monday.