I haven’t had a decent BLT for years.

It’s a cool, crisp mid-August afternoon here in north Texas, the thermometer peaking at only 92° under a blue and remarkably not hazy sky. I only mention the weather because our typical daytime temperature this time of year is more like 105° with muggy air that’s not fit to breathe unless you’re an armadillo or a herd of grasshoppers.

Know what’s happening today? I’m waiting for FedEx to deliver MY VERY FIRST ORDER from Pleasant Hill Grain, a company that sells all kinds of tasty canned meat for senior citizens ... a lot like those nice people at Brinkman Farms who sent me a big order in July. I decided to try Pleasant Hill Grain’s variety pack — cans of beef chunks, ground beef, turkey, chicken and pork — and just for the hell of it I also threw in a can of cooked ready-to-eat bacon because people apparently LOVE this crap and everybody should eat more bacon, anyway. I’m thinking BLT sandwiches. I haven’t had a decent BLT for years.

Once again I’m probably the last person to announce the news that Lauren Bacall died yesterday, but in case you didn’t already know: LAUREN BACALL DIED YESTERDAY. She was one month shy of her 90th birthday and died at home following a stroke.

This fulfills that eerie old wives’ tale about celebrity deaths always coming in “threes.” IT ACTUALLY HAPPENS, PEOPLE. We started a couple of weeks ago with James Garner, remember? Then Robin Williams died on Monday and now Lauren Bacall. Three in a row. Holy crap. And I mean this sincerely.

Thank you for your support. What are you having for dinner tonight?