It’s hard to say goodbye.

If you’re reading this post, I have some news for you … it’s my last, and I’ve instructed my precious Sam how to publish this for me as soon as I’ve passed on.

While I’ve had a number of life-challenging illesses for many years, none could actually end my life if I was diligent about taking appropriate medications, such as diabetes, arthritis, congestive heart failure, gout, diabetic neuropathy, chronic kidney disease, and so on. However, there’s one illness that we haven’t been able to slow, reverse or control — a bacterial infection — because I’m completely resistant to all known antibiotics. In recent weeks I’ve been struggling with a cellulitis infection throughout the right side of my body (from my foot up to my hip) that’s painful, red and warm to the touch … in addition to the incurable urinary tract infection I’ve been battling for three years. The high, spiking fever (from 95° to 102°) associated with bacterial infections always renders me unconscious, especially when the spike happens in less than an hour or two.

I’ve asked Sam not to call the hospice’s 24-hour crisis nursing team next time this happens, and I don’t want any more medications dribbled into my mouth with an eyedropper. I just want to pass away in my sleep. So if you’re reading this, that’s exactly what’s happened.

My life was way too short, but it was filled to the brim with love. Thank you, Sam, for the happy, joyous life we’ve had together, right up until the end.

I also want to mention a few wonderful, special people … my sister Robin, her beautiful daughters Melissa and Allison, and my cousins Bobby, Karen and Ron, and my best friend Sandi for the last 56 years. All of you know how much I’ve always loved you.

We’ll meet again. I promise.

Free fonts with a stunning display of background textures and clip art.

Once again I’m waking up after two long, long naps. The first was 18 hours, from 5:30 a.m. until 7:45 p.m. last night, and another four hours from 11 p.m. until 3 a.m. this morning, just a few minutes ago. Life is upside-down. I sleep all day, I’m up all night, but fortunately Sam is usually on the same schedule with me.

Unlimited help for one stinking buckaroo and “live chat” at 4:30 in the morning.

Glory hallelujah, hot damn and what the fuck! I just had a nightmarish issue with the Howdygram and thought I’d lost the old girl forever. About an hour ago I tried to begin composing a new post — this one, to be specific — but got an error window instead (see below) when I clicked the “new post” link. And then I got myself snaggled up with a screwy help website — JustAnswer.com — that I assumed was a free Google forum for Blogspot bloggers like yours truly. Boy, was I wrong!

I’m not especially interested in who the hell my nurse is. No kidding.

Hey. It’s me again. I’ve been housebound and bedridden for about five years already, so I have to admit that I don’t have too much to write about if I try to produce a Howdygram post more often than once or twice a week. Sad, isn’t it? I’ve given up on reading the news — local, national, global — so political commentary is pretty much dead in the water. My life has shriveled to an endless string of 18-hour naps, urinary tract spasms and weird meals. I’ll just have to make do with writing whatever I want, whenever I want … and let it go at that. You’ll get used to it, I promise.

I’ve discovered a new digital arts shop on Etsy.com.

Hello and happy Sunday from Howdygram headquarters. I’ve been trying to write this post for more than a week but got myself caught up in a cycle of extremely long and unexpected naps … and by the time I finally realized what was happening it was 10:45 Saturday night. At that point I was more interested in food and a pleasant conversation with Sam. What a clusterfuck … especially since I didn’t have a chance to recognize my father’s 100th birthday in heaven! He was born on July 13, 1920, and was buried just two days after his 82nd birthday. I think about my father every day of my life and regret that Sam never had a chance to know him.

I’m especially hysterical about Hand-Pulled Rotisserie Chicken White Meat.

So here’s what’s happening here today: ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. It’s 3:25 a.m. on Wednesday morning I tried to write this post at dinnertime on Tuesday but couldn’t stay awake long enough to write the first sentence. After an 11-hour nap I finally woke up about 15 minutes ago, said “hello” to Sam, and decided to start writing immediately so I could actually make some progress with this post. Jesus.

Tremors, squeezy feet and 18-hour naps. That’s the story of my life.

’Tis the Day of the Onion Rings here at Howdygram headquarters. This morning at 2 a.m. when I asked Sam to make me a bag of Nathan's Famous Thick Sliced Battered Onion Rings he delivered the devastating news that we didn’t have any more in the freezer … whereupon I immediately ordered four bags from Amazon Fresh along with a small order of incredible delicacies that included: (1) Sargento’s Pepper Jack Cheese; (2) Annie Chun’s White Sticky Rice; (3) one pound of Reser’s Cole Slaw; (4) one pound of Reser’s Macaroni Salad; (5) frozen Citrus Pop-Ups* in three thrilling flavors; (6) Sweet Baby Ray’s Sweet & Spicy Barbecue Sauce; (7) a half-pound of Italian Spicy Mixed Olive Bruschetta; (8) Farm Rich Mozzarella Sticks; and (9) six La Brea Bakery Take-and-Bake French Dinner Rolls.

Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Why can’t it be onion rings?

I haven’t decided yet if this will be a long or a short Howdygram post because there’s a lot of very important crapola going on here today and tomorrow.

Dear World: I hate Greg Abbott and love Amazon Fresh!

The state of Texas is out of its fucking mind. Our maniacal pro-Trump governor, grifter-in-chief Greg Abbott, decided all by himself — against warnings and directives by the CDC and the Board of Health — to “reopen” the state so that everybody can go back to their favorite hair and nail salons, bars, restaurants and shopping malls even though Texas has the worst COVID-19 infection rate in the United States with more new cases daily than ANYWHERE … including Mars. After Abbott’s proclamation, the entire under-30 age group did exactly what he wanted them to do, and barely two weeks later they all wound up infected with Coronavirus. Totally predictable and expected, and now all those poor twits are sick, miserable, unemployed and hospitalized with no insurance coverage! To make things even worse, now their parents are sick, their children are sick, their grandparents are sick, their friends are sick and their neighbors are sick.

Introducing Marcy’s Easy-Peasy Opioids and Olives Diet!

The life of a bedridden coot is an interesting one. Mostly, I guess, I’m faced with an endless stretch of days and weeks, ridiculous 18-hour spans of sleep, forgotten meals and missed medications … I almost can’t keep up sometimes. At the moment it’s 8:45 Wednesday morning. I’d like to take my morning meds, but Sam hasn’t brought them to me yet (he’s asleep), so I thought I’d kill a little time with the Howdygram. Hello, everybody.

Sam has acquired the manly art of whackin’ down shit with a chainsaw!

Happy Wednesday morning, ladies and gentlemen. I’m enjoying one of my favorite movies — Act One (1963) starring George Hamilton and Jason Robards — while Sam and I wait for a visit from my hospice’s Director of Nursing. Martha said she’d be here between 11 and 12 with a plan to discuss two different subjects: 1) can we please tell her which medications I don’t take any more* so she can update her records; and 2) she wants to figure out if there’s a way to make me more comfortable in bed because right now I’m not (comfortable, that is) and it’s entirely likely that I’m not breathing properly or digesting my food very well, either.

Remember in my last post when I told you I was losing interest in fonts? I lied.

It’s been a whole week since my last Howdygram post, but I’ve got a solid reason that: I’VE BEEN ASLEEP. Yes, for the whole goddamn week!

I’d hate to lose control of my nipples. I’m so fond of them!

I’ve got lots of stuff to tell you this afternoon, okay? It’s a few measly minutes after 3 p.m. and I just woke up from a long, long, long, long sleep. I just I asked Sam “how long” and his only reply was “L.O.N.G.” I’m guessing maybe 18 hours. My cannula is driving me crazy,  the air jets hurt like hell, I can’t really remember the last time I saw daylight, and now we’re due for heavy rain for the next several days and it’s already dark as a dungeon outside. Blecch. I thought it was Monday but just realized I was wrong … it’s Tuesday! I have no recollection of Saturday or Sunday, either.

The Whine List expands.

Good morning and a happy Thursday to one and all. It’s 4:30 a.m. and Sam is getting ready for his first walk of the day. He usually starts at the forest in south Mesquite — called Samuell Farm, believe it or not! — and communes with the moon and stars. He gets home just as the sun comes up. Typically he’d stop at Wal-Mart first to pick up a few necessities, but the store changed its hours after the COVID-19 hoo-hah kicked in so he waits a little later now to make his grocery run. (My appetite has been low this week. I ran out of applesauce.)

Know what? The quarantine has been great for business!

I’m having a conundrum this morning. It’s a few minutes before 7 a.m. and my hands are freezing. They should be tucked underneath my blanket … except I also feel like typing, so this definitely sucks. I suppose I’ll just keep plugging away until I figure out what I want more … warm hands or a Howdygram post! (Right now the Howdygram post is winning.)