Monday, July 6, 2020

Tremors, squeezy feet and 18-hour naps. That’s the story of my life.

’Tis the Day of the Onion Rings here at Howdygram headquarters. This morning at 2 a.m. when I asked Sam to make me a bag of Nathan's Famous Thick Sliced Battered Onion Rings he delivered the devastating news that we didn’t have any more in the freezer … whereupon I immediately ordered four bags from Amazon Fresh along with a small order of incredible delicacies that included: (1) Sargento’s Pepper Jack Cheese; (2) Annie Chun’s White Sticky Rice; (3) one pound of Reser’s Cole Slaw; (4) one pound of Reser’s Macaroni Salad; (5) frozen Citrus Pop-Ups* in three thrilling flavors; (6) Sweet Baby Ray’s Sweet & Spicy Barbecue Sauce; (7) a half-pound of Italian Spicy Mixed Olive Bruschetta; (8) Farm Rich Mozzarella Sticks; and (9) six La Brea Bakery Take-and-Bake French Dinner Rolls.

FROZEN “365” BRAND CITRUS POP-UPS. You get six in a box, two each of three different flavors: Lemonade, Orangeade and Strawberry Lemonade. I’ll do an official food review elsewhere in this post. Don’t go anywhere, okay?

Everything was delivered at 9 a.m., right on time, and I can’t tell you how happy I am to have a well-stuffed freezer again! However, I didn’t order any Royal Asia Boom Boom Shrimp from Amazon Fresh this time because we already have more than enough on hand … about four pounds!

In case you’re interested … with reference to the first paragraph, (1) is for Sam, (7) will be used as a spread for (9), and Sam and I will share (8) because we love these little hoo-hahs with pasta sauce. (We’ve tried lots of brands but Farm Rich is the best.) Our absolute favorite pasta sauce is Classico’s Italian Sausage with Onions and Peppers. It’s so good I could eat it out of the jar with a spoon.



I CAN’T STOP SLEEPING. Believe it or not, I started this post three days ago but never got past the first paragraph due to unexpected naps lasting 12 to 18 hours at a time plus time out for a couple of meals here and there. I nod off mid-sentence and wake up not knowing the day, the date or the time. I’m definitely losing my grip. And it happened again tonight. I woke up an hour ago from another nap and the family room was blazing with sunlight. I looked at the clock on the mantel — it was 7:00 — so I assumed it was morning because it was so bright in here. WRONG! Sam reminded me that the family room faces west, which means we don’t get any morning sun in here. It was 7 p.m. — not 7 a.m. — and Sam told me I’d been asleep for 14 hours and just lost another entire whole day. This is extremely disturbing. Jesus.

I CAN’T STOP SHAKING. It’s tremors again in my hands and fingers, making it difficult (and sometimes impossible) to use my iMac keyboard and write a Howdygram post. After I type a word or a sentence I have to jerk my hands away from the keyboard so I don’t add extra characters, spaces or returns. Tremors make my life miserable.

MY FEET FEEL LIKE THEY’RE BEING “SQUEEZED.” The nerves in my feet are dying from advanced diabetic peripheral neuropathy, so both of my feet constantly tingle (i.e., like the feeling you get when your foot falls asleep and tries to “wake up”) and I also feel like I’m wearing skin tight sandals with straps digging into my skin and cutting off my circulation. My ankles are squeezed, my arches are squeezed and my toes are squeezed. All the time. I never get a break.



Here’s a review of the aforementioned ”365” BRAND CITRUS POP-UPS that I briefly discussed earlier in this post. These are tasty frozen citrus treats from Whole Foods (via Amazon Fresh) — a combination of sherbet and Italian ices — in three delightful flavors: Lemonade, Orangeade and Strawberry Lemonade. I like them for a trio of excellent reasons: (1) the flavors are delightful and refreshing; (2) a person can eat them lying in bed; and (3) I can’t think of anything else. However, I’m only awarding them a four-chopper rating because they’re fucking puny — what I typically refer to as toddler-size — and you have to eat A MINIMUM OF TWO of the damn things to get a decent portion.




Carl Reiner, 98, the writer, producer, director and actor who was part of Sid Caesar’s legendary comedy team in the 1950s and went on to create “The Dick Van Dyke Show” and direct several hit films, died Monday night of natural causes at his home in Beverly Hills.

He was the winner of nine Emmy awards, including five for “The Dick Van Dyke Show.” Reiner’s  most popular films as a director included Oh God (1977) starring George Burns, The Jerk (1979) starring Steve Martin, and All of Me (1984) starring Steve Martin and Lily Tomlin.


Reiner remained in the public eye well into his 80s and 90s with roles in the popular Ocean’s Eleven trio of films and on TV with recurring roles on sitcoms “Two and a Half Men” and “Hot in Cleveland.” He also did voice work for shows including “Family Guy,” “American Dad,” “King of the Hill,” and “Bob’s Burgers.”

Reiner first came to prominence as a regular cast member of Sid Caesar’s “Your Show of Shows,” for which he won two Emmys in 1956 and 1957 in the supporting category. He met Mel Brooks during his time with Caesar. The two went on to have a lifetime friendship and comedy partnership through their recurring “2000 Year Old Man” sketches.

Before creating CBS hit “The Dick Van Dyke Show,” in which he frequently appeared, Reiner and Brooks developed a skit in which Reiner played straight man-interviewer to Brooks’ “2000 Year Old Man.” A 1961 recording of the skit was an immediate hit and spawned several sequels, the last of which, 1998’s “The 2000 Year Old Man in the Year 2000,” won the pair a Grammy.

Reiner’s wife Estelle died in 2008. He is survived by two sons (Meathead and Lucas) and a daughter (Sylvia Anne). Rest in peace, you blessed funnyman!


This might be my juiciest list of free fonts EVER. I’ve got something for everybody here … terrific scripts, casual hand-lettered fonts, fun display fonts and eight fabulous layered fonts. There are also three font bundles represented here, each packed with more than 30 fonts. My favorites today include “Aragel,” “Fresh Orange,” “Lovely Paws,” “Ultra,” “CA Kometo” and “Tommy Soft.” Download links will appear below the font list. Enjoy!




Here are some of the most gorgeous (and versatile) digital backgrounds I’ve ever showcased in the Howdygram. Each is 12” square and 300 dpi, and because they’re also seamless you can tile them in any direction to make a much larger image. That being said, I’M IN LOVE WITH ALL OF THEM and can’t really pick a favorite … although the Cool Pink Foils, the Metallic Blue Paint, the Metallic Teal Paint and the Distressed Red Textures have a slight edge. A very slight edge. I found all of these collections on Etsy.com last night on sale for 65¢ each (that’s 75% off) and couldn’t resist buying them ALL. Holy crap, right?


If you ever want any of my background collections just shoot me an email and I’ll send you a zip file, okay?



Whoa, we had some HUGE THUNDERSTORMS plow through here earlier tonight. Torrential rain, straight-line winds, pea-sized hailstones, plenty of thunder and lightning, and a couple of brief power outages. Thank God the power outages didn’t last long … it’s terrifying when the power goes out when it’s pitch black outside and you’re hooked up to an electric oxygen concentrator! More storms are on the way this morning (starting around 8 am.) and are in the forecast through 6 p.m. Tuesday. That’s a lot of heavy weather! Auntie Em! Auntie Em!

I’d better go ahead and publish this post so I can get started on my next one. Thank you for reading this and don’t forget to remember the Alamo!

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