My favorite cereal is Special K with petrified strawberries and almond milk.

Know what happens every year after the Fourth of July? THE FIFTH OF JULY! Woo-hoo!

I slept until the crack of noon today, dear readers, although I have no idea why, and Sam even had to wake me so I could take my breakfast-time meds. I’m officially out of whack now (oy, shit) and my brain is officially scrambled, but I’ll eventually get myself back into whack this afternoon when I’m sitting at my computer desk uploading nearly two dozen thoroughly adorable new mug designs to The Howdygram Store. And I’ve got at least a dozen more that I’m still working on. (Plus lots of new greeting card designs, too.)

Yes. friends … I’m having a heavenly time with my creative projects again, and it feels like somebody’s pumping life back into my body! In the meantime, however, I haven’t eaten anything yet today, and I sure wouldn’t mind something fun like a bowl of cereal … maybe Special K with petrified strawberries and almond milk!

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In yesterday’s post I promised I’d show off a few of The Howdygram Store’s new mug designs … and here they are! There are 21 in all but I decided only to pick the first four because I don’t want to be obnoxious about this.

Four of The Howdygram Store’s newest mug designs. (There are 21 new designs in all.)

By the way, if you think these adorable mugs (and the rest of my 144 designs) would make really perfect, affordable gifts for practically everybody in your life, you’re right. Full retail price on Zazzle’s website is $14.95, but several times a year they go on sale for up to 50% off. That’s right, only $7.47 each … which makes them even MORE adorable and affordable! (And if you ever want me to customize a design for you, just ask!)

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Everybody knows I like to eat weird shit. I get various mentally ill “flavor cravings” because I haven’t been out of the house for eight years — either to dine in a restaurant or to shop for food in a supermarket — and I therefore have to find ways to satisfy my aforementioned cravings or I’ll blow my brains out. Lately one of my favorite flavor cravings has been PICKLED BEETS with SOUR CREAM. Another has been VIENNA SAUSAGES with GREY POUPON DIJON MUSTARD, as seen posing for a portrait below.

Grey Poupon and Vienna Sausages. One of my favorite combinations!

Technically, Vienna Sausages are teeny canned hot dogs with a squishy texture and a very mild flavor. They’re soft. And that makes them excellent if you want to eat them lying down (I eat damn near everything lying down) right out of the can while you dunk them into something with a mountain of flavor ... like Grey Poupon Dijon mustard. A nice, spicy barbecue sauce might work, too, or even A-1 Steak Sauce. (Please, however, not ketchup. NEVER KETCHUP.)

And now let’s discuss GREEN RIVER POP, a Chicago original and an extremely big hoo-hah where carbonated beverages are concerned. Green River is a neon green lime soda. It was my mother’s all-time favorite beverage for her entire life, and she introduced me to it when I was three years old. We used to go to her favorite restaurant on Wabash Avenue — Paulson’s — under the “L” tracks after shopping at Marshall Field’s, and she’d let me order a grilled hot dog with cheese (I think they were called “Francheezies”) and a Green River with crushed ice. I also remember a coffee shop in downtown Skokie called Pan-Dee that served Green River. We’d eat lunch at Pan-Dee after swimming lessons at the Devonshire Pools, and I’d always order a Green River and an “Oliveburger Dee-luxe.” (You know, a hamburger with minced green olives.) My entire life always revolved around food … and it still does.

Green River lime “pop” is a true Chicago original. It was my mother’s favorite … and mine, too!

Incidentally, I was having a discussion yesterday on Facebook with a total stranger who assured me that Green River pop still exists and you can even find it minus sugar, so I immediately went to The Source of All Things Impossible — Amazon — and confirmed that he was absolutely right.

I ordered two one-litre bottles from Amazon, and they’ll be here next week!

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Thank you for reading this. It was nice of y’all to stop by on your way to the Alamo!