I’m really anxious to get back to my creative life again.

Good morning to you, one and all. Also shalom in case you didn’t know, or had forgotten, that Sam and I are Jewish.

After comparing four potential new Medicare Advantage plans for 2019, I’m pleased to announce my decision! I’ve decided to sign up for the Blue Cross Medicare Advantage Choice Plus (PPO) with a $0 monthly premium. The other three plans also had a $0 monthly premium … but Blue Cross stood out from the rest with its cheaper drug coverage.

The weirdest product on Wal-Mart.com’s virtual grocery shelves: B&M Canned Brown Bread.

WEDNESDAY, 8/29/2018, 12:07 P.M. I’m already not having a very good day and it’s only a few minutes past noon. I think my big issue right now is skin pain, especially a small area on my inner right thigh. My skin is unbearably sensitive, and right now I’ve got a pruny, agony-riddled expression on my face that’s probably nasty enough to scare away the neighbors, I’m gritting what’s left of my teeth, and I started moaning — rhythmically — about half an hour ago. Sam can’t hear me because he’s asleep, but if I wanted to wake him I’m pretty sure I could do it ... and he’d jump up to diagnose the problem and find out how he can help. God bless Sam ...

Do you have any idea how many glorious meals an elderly person can make from canned food?!

It’s Wednesday morning, and it’s good to be alive! I won’t get too dramatic with you (if I can help it), but lately I’m beginning to have a different view of life. For instance, I treasure every Popsicle … and I frequently ponder the beautiful canned goods in my pantry, a few of which include: 1) Del Monte Zucchini in Italian Style Tomato Sauce; 2) pickled beets; 3) Chef Boyardee Chili Mac, Mac & Cheese, Ravioli, and Spaghetti Rings with Fetal Meatballs; 4) Del Monte Whole New Potatoes; 5) Ro-Tel Diced Tomatoes; 6) Campbell’s Chicken Gravy. With a pantry like this, do you blame me? Do you have any idea how many glorious meals an elderly person can make from canned food like that?!

I must be hungry. There’s no other explanation for the first paragraph of this post.

I choose not to mention the Alamo because my brain is at the czar’s Winter Palace in St. Petersburg, Russia.

Yo, shalom and hi-de-ho from the nerve center of Howdygram headquarters! It’s a pleasant Sunday morning here in north Texas, although I wouldn’t know anything whatsoever about the weather, the temperature, the humidity, or when we’re expecting our next rainfall … because I never leave this room (or this house), and if I want to know any pedestrian weather statistics I’ll simply have to rely on The Weather Channel. Therefore ...

Sam might make a scouting visit to The Villages of Lake Highlands today.

I’d like to begin this post with a general overview of Saturday, August 4 … using neatly-typed bright red subheads. Thank you.

I’VE BEEN COMPLETELY UNCONSCIOUS since 8 o’clock this morning and honestly don’t remember anything after that … although my day started long before 8 a.m. Frankly, I remember first waking up around 4, with Sam whispering that I never took my bedtime meds. So I opened my eyes, yanked off my cannula (plastic breathing apparatus), swallowed a fistful of pills and announced that I’d like to sit at my computer workstation for a few hours. So that’s what I did, and I was still sitting at my desk — developing several new greeting card designs — when Sam left to go for his morning walk at 5:45. By the time he got home, though, I was exhausted and nodding off, so I took a nice juicy dose of liquid Morphine, shlepped myself back to the chaise lounge and passed out.

Welcome to the home of the Ear Wound, the Big Red Nose Bruise and the Screaming Baby Toe.

I am completely upside-down ever since I pulled that screwy all-nighter the day before yesterday. It’s not that I’m turning into a graveyard-shifter or anything, but I find myself conking out for hours on end and I’m never awake long enough to start — or finish — a Howdygram post. I apologize for that. I tried to write a post last night but never got past the lede paragraph. (And it was a good one, too. I might use it again sometime.) Incidentally, Sam is in the same predicament … so at least we’re doing this together!

My favorite cereal is Special K with petrified strawberries and almond milk.

Know what happens every year after the Fourth of July? THE FIFTH OF JULY! Woo-hoo!

Sam is my full-time caregiver, and he deserves as many Dairy Queen blizzards as he can get.

Woo-hoo … Sam and I are trying SOMETHING NEW today! Instead of waiting until late afternoon (around 5 p.m.) for me to get up off the chaise and use my computer, I’m giving it a shot around 10 a.m. instead … which is the time I used to migrate into the study in years past. It was Sam who suggested this, actually, because he has more energy in the morning to shlep things around in the family room, crawl on the floor to relocate my catheter bag and scoot under the desk to plug in my computer and lamp. It’s definitely a lot of work. He’s my full-time caregiver and he deserves as many breaks — and Dairy Queen blizzards! — as he can get.