Thunderstorms are attacking Howdygram headquarters.

Today’s the BIG DAY, people. Today’s the day ABC airs Diane Sawyer’s special two-hour exposé about Bruce Jenner to discover the SECRET TRUTH about his long hair, poofy lips, French manicures and JIGGLY NEW BOOBIES! Check your local listings; here in Dallas the interview airs at 8 p.m. and I know you won’t want to miss it.

---

In an effort to make you really jealous and wish you were here, I recorded the following excellent movies today on TCM to view with Sam over the weekend with popcorn. They include:

• Being There (1979) starring Peter Sellers, Melvyn Douglas and Shirley MacLaine
• The Apartment (1960) starring Jack Lemmon, Fred MacMurray and Shirley MacLaine
• Forbidden Planet (1956) starring Walter Pidgeon, Anne Francis, Leslie Nielsen and a robot
• North by Northwest (1959) starring Cary Grant, Eva Marie Saint and James Mason
• Ben-Hur (1959) starring Charlton Heston, a few lepers, Stephen Boyd and Jesus

TCM is also showing a few fine films on Saturday and Sunday that you shouldn’t miss.

• The Son of Kong (1933) starring Robert Armstrong and Helen Mack
• Rodan (1956) starring Japanese actors and giant prehistoric pterodactyls destroying Tokyo
• The Private Life of Henry VIII (1933) starring Charles Laughton and Robert Donat
• The Pride of the Yankees (1942) starring decrepit Gary Cooper at age 40 pretending to be a college student, Walter Brennan with teeth and Teresa Wright
• Singin’ in the Rain (1952) starring Gene Kelly, Donald O’Connor and Debbie Reynolds

In case you need an incentive to watch Singin’ in the Rain I’m pleased to offer the following video clip of Donald O’Connor and Gene Kelly dancing to “Moses Supposes.” Are they adorable, or what? This is one of my all-time favorite dance numbers.

---

Shitty weather is imminent here tonight. As a matter of fact, there’s a large line of scary storms moving across Arlington as I write this post that’s headed straight for the Dallas metro area. We’ve got a “TorCon” Level 6 Warning — whatever the hell THAT is — plus a general Wizard of Oz Alert for twisters, basketball-size hail and flying monkeys.

The sky is pitch black and I can already hear a shitload of thunder here, and I’m located in the general vicinity of the red star in the map directly above. Holy crap. AUNTIE EM! AUNTIE EM!

I think the we’re going to lose power so I’d better publish this post immediately and nuke my leftover pizza. Thank you for reading this.