Friday, July 27, 2018

Sam enjoys a multi-mile hike every morning at Samuell Park in south Mesquite.

FRIDAY, JULY 27, 2018. Happy Friday night, boys and girls. I’ve had a strangely lazy day today that involved all of the following activities: 1) sleeping; 2) peeing; 3) eating things; 4) sucking Popsicles; 5) talking to my sister Robin; and 6) watching Sam tighten several loose bolts on the nice upholstered bench at the foot of the chaise lounge. I know, I know. It’s a full life. And now let’s take a look at the weekend — and the entire week — ahead, shall we?

Since there’s nothing else coming up for the remainder of tonight — aside from filling my catheter bag, a bedtime snack and trying NOT to watch The Alamo (1960) starring John Wayne, Richard Widmark and (please don’t vomit) Frankie Avalon — here’s my official Calendar of Thrills as of 9:25 p.m. on Friday, July 27. I promise to be as brief as possible.

SATURDAY: NOTHING. SUNDAY: NOTHING. MONDAY: A bath @ 10 a.m., but I don’t know with whom yet because Letitia has a day off. TUESDAY: A meeting @ 10 a.m. with Theresa, my hospice social worker. WEDNESDAY: A bath @ 12 noon (two hours later than usual) because Sam has a doctor’s appointment. THURSDAY: NOTHING. FRIDAY: A bath @ 10 a.m.

This isn’t exactly jam-packed, as you can see for yourself, although I promise to add activities whenever they become available … especially if I find that I’m able to resume my advanced ballroom dance classes. Thank you.

SATURDAY, JULY 28, 2018. To begin, it’s a few minutes past midnight and I’d like to comment that I didn’t get my FAKE SALISBURY STEAKS with Immediate Wonderful Gravy for dinner last night, mostly because I didn’t get up off my chaise at all on Friday and this is a meal that’s too hot and too sloppy to eat lying down. (Feel free to ask me how I know this.) Therefore I’ve decided to reschedule Fake Salisbury Steaks with Immediate Wonderful Gravy for Saturday instead. I’ll even include pictures if possible.

I’ve been using my MacBook laptop for almost five months and just discovered that I can resize graphics and emulate quite a few Photoshop features using the MAC’S SIMPLE PREVIEW APPLICATION. To tell you the truth, what I was able to do tonight with an image of Del Monte pickled beets was nothing short of astonishing. (You’ll just have to take my word for it, however.)

And while I’m discussing graphics and pictures … SAM ENJOYS A MULTI-MILE HIKE every morning at Samuell Park in south Mesquite, and yesterday (at my request) he finally decided to shoot a few photos for the Howdygram. Here’s my favorite! As a matter of fact, I was even able to use Preview to lighten the image, reduce the shadows, brighten the highlights and modify the contrast settings. Just as good as Photoshop … and a lot less expensive! (Actually, Preview is FREE, and it’s included with the Mac’s OS. Adobe Photoshop will cost you $19.95 a month.)

Sam snapped this photo at sunrise on Friday during his five-mile walk through Samuell Park.

Later this morning I want to brainstorm with Sam about MISERABLE SORES on the bridge of my nose and behind my right ear … both caused by trying to wear a cannula (the plastic breathing apparatus that comes with an oxygen generator) and reading glasses at the same time. The problem is, whenever I fall asleep with my glasses on I always wake up a few hours later COMPLETELY BRUISED. There has to be a way to prevent this, because the bruises look like shit and hurt like hell. Sam initially suggested withholding my laptop at bedtime so I wouldn’t be able to use my glasses and cannula at the same time … but holy crap, no creative person would ever agree to that! I’m sure we’ll come up with something. Stay tuned for additional information, but please feel free to resume your normal routine in the meantime.

It’s almost time for me to shut down and get some sleep, but first I want to share my thoughts on ”THE ALAMO” (1960) starring John Wayne and Richard Widmark, the movie I’ve been avoiding all night like the plague.

Richard Widmark as Jim Bowie and Laurence Harvey as Colonel William Travis in “The Alamo.”

THIS MOVIE STINKS, PEOPLE. John Wayne directed, and in that capacity he had an opportunity to stuff the cast with relatives (two sons, daughters-in-law and grandchildren) plus pals from other movies … whether they were qualified or not. I think the two biggest casting fuck-ups were Frankie Avalon (obviously an effort to guarantee a teenage audience at the box office) and Englishman Laurence Harvey — with an atrocious American accent — as Colonel William Travis.

Frankie Avalon as Smitty in “The Alamo.”

Thank you for reading this. I think you’d appreciate the real Alamo a whole lot more than John Wayne’s bullshit version!

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