Wednesday, July 2, 2014

The morons are winning.

I’m grieved to report that THE MORONS ARE WINNING, boys and girls, and our frustration level here at Howdygram headquarters is on high alert today. Please bear with me for a few minutes while I try to explain what’s (still) going on with the grout people, the glass people and Web.com. Thank you in advance for putting up with me.

WE HAVEN’T HEARD FROM CLAYTON. Clayton, leader of the grout people, was supposed to call us on Monday to let us know when Tim, leader of the glass people, will come back to adjust the shower door in our master bathroom. Tim replaced and resealed the shower door frame more than a week ago, but when we finally started using the shower again on Friday the damn door won’t stay closed and we’re getting water all over the bathroom floor. WE ARE EXTREMELY FED UP AND READY TO STRANGLE SOMEBODY. Clayton and Tim have been dicking around with this project for FOUR FREAKIN’ MONTHS already.

WEB.COM IS STILL TRYING TO RUIN MY LIFE. Three weeks ago I emailed their reseller support department the last of my clients’ Account Ownership Transfer Agreement forms because I’m finally retired and they need to start billing each client directly for website hosting effective immediately. Just for the hell of it I logged on this morning to see if Web.com tried to charge me by mistake for July, and they did precisely what I expected them to do: LOUSE IT UP. Web.com never processed the last seven transfer forms, all seven websites are still listed in my name and they all show up online as “past due” because I closed down my Chase Mastercard more than a week ago TO PREVENT THEM FROM CHARGING MY CARD. When I tried to call the billing department a little while ago I waited 25 minutes on hold and then got disconnected immediately after somebody answered. I’M DONE. I hope they all drop dead.

Actually, I haven’t decided yet if I’ll try one last time to get in touch with Web.com to find out what the hell is going on over there. Sam is getting ready to go to Wal-Mart to pick up a couple of prescriptions so I might call again while he’s gone. Or maybe I’ll play video poker instead. Even losing at video poker is better than talking to the morons at Web.com.

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