We have no plans for Sunday whatsoever except for rinsing off a bunch of dishes in the kitchen sink.

Truth be told, Saturday wasn’t so hot around here. I was in a semi-shitty mood throughout the morning due to an unexplained migraine the night before, I had a crappy overall level of knee pain all day long, and then, just for fun and at no additional charge, sometime around midnight I smashed my right foot into the bathroom door jam and split a toenail. To make matters worse, the erroneous meatballs I received yesterday from Artizone [see my last post] were REPULSIVE. For the outrageous price of $12, the vendor — who deserves to be FLOGGED — gives you eight spongy little one-inch meatballs floating in a a puddle of cheap pasta sauce. If I actually had to pay for that crap I would’ve demanded my money back. Even half a cup of parmesan cheese didn’t help.

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To cheer myself up I ordered some nice shit yesterday from Wal-Mart. Sam needed shaving cream and I wanted green olives and cookies. Here’s what I bought: 1) two twin-packs of Edge shaving gel; 2) two jars of Wal-Mart’s store brand jumbo green olives with red thingies in them; 3) vanilla wafers for Sam; 4) sugar-free fudge graham crackers for me; and 5) Wal-Mart’s cheapo barbecue potato chips that taste better than Lay’s.

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And now for another installment of our popular BELIEVE IT OR DON’T BELIEVE IT, where I post before & after pictures of featured celebrities just for the hell of it when they were really young and you almost can’t recognize them any more. This time I’m spotlighting Richard Benjamin and Paula Prentiss, a pair of intensely popular actors who got their start during the 1960s when they were still adorable. Married for 53 years, Paula basically retired in the 1990s but Richard still works and also produces things and directs. I think they’re cute as hell.

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It’s almost 4 a.m. and I think I’m finally sufficiently comfortable enough to crawl into bed with Sam, because I don’t like to give it a shot until I’m relatively pain-free so I won’t disturb him. We have no plans for Sunday whatsoever except for rinsing off a bunch of dishes in the kitchen sink and I want to make a really nice pot of soup.

Thank you for your ongoing interest in all this baloney.