Saturday, January 24, 2015

Ernie Banks was goddamn adorable.

While Sam is at Wal-Mart picking up prescriptions I’ve decided to hang out in the study and write this Howdygram post. I don’t think I’ll be able to finish it, however, due to my morning meds making me feel loopy and inebriated AND I NEED A BIG NAP.



The Howdygram is sad to report the passing of baseball legend Ernie Banks, who died unexpectedly yesterday at age 83. I can’t think of a single sarcastic thing to say about Ernie Banks because he was ABSOLUTELY AWESOME.
Known everywhere as “Mr. Cub,” Banks signed on as the Cubs’ first African-American player in 1953 and went on to become an 11-time All-Star, a two-time National League MVP (1958-59) and played his entire 18-year major league career — from 1953 to 1971 — with the Cubs. In 2013 Banks was awarded a Presidential Medal of Freedom by President Obama during ceremonies at the White House in recognition of a lifetime of being so goddamn adorable.
On a personal note, I grew up in Chicago in a family that adored the Cubs, and I saw Ernie Banks play at Wrigley Field more times than I can count. The memories are indelible and nobody else will ever wear number 14. PLAY BALL!



And now, for your Saturday morning entertainment, I found this hilarious video clip from Senator Marco Rubio’s (R-FL) infamous State of the Union rebuttal speech in 2013 — the one where he lunged for a bottle of water and took a really juvenile, fucked-up gulp on live TV.





One more thing before I take my late-morning nap. SAM CAME HOME WITH A PRESENT FOR ME FROM WAL-MART! To help me keep track of my growing collection of prescription medications I’ve finally got my very own gigantic drug organizer with four clever little color-coded compartments for each day of the week. I’m so happy I could blow up!
Thank you for reading this. I hope you and yours have a very pleasant Saturday.

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