Monday, October 26, 2015

Gift ideas just in time for Hanukkah.

Greetings and salutations, Howdygramsters! While I sit here digesting a bag of Mountain House freeze-dried entrees for senior citizens and pondering the next phase of my Monday evening activities — a hot shower, cookies and a nap come to mind — I thought I’d produce my second post of the day and kill a little time. You’re welcome.

Governor Piyush “Call-Me-Bobby” Jindal, in his ten millionth last-ditch desperate plea for attention, briefly threatened to boycott Wednesday’s kids’ table stupid losers debate on CNBC.

Despite his campaign having no money, no purpose and no support, Jindal’s people, of whom he still has one or two, insist that if the Republican National Committee and CNBC would factor in his “phenomenal polling” in Iowa, they’d see he definitely belongs on the main stage with winners like high-energy orangutan Donald Trump and Ben “I Want To Hit You With A Brick” Carson.
The Washington Examiner reports that Jindal campaign officials got the idea after CNBC modified the debate’s format to accommodate demands by Trump and Carson, such as cutting back to two hours with opening and closing statements as well as commercials. So Jindal’s team decided that if the top two candidates can win concessions by threatening to stay home, then maybe Bobby Jindal can throw some shit around, too.

Except it didn’t work.

Despite the foot-stomping and threats to take his ball and go home, CNBC announced that Jindal was nevertheless consigned to the undercard, shocking absolutely no one at all. Jindal confirmed to Tucker Carlson’s Internet Thing Sunday that he would indeed take part in the undercard debate, even though he’s clearly poised to win Iowa (where a recent NBC poll has him in 5th place) and deserves more respect.

Once again Piyush Jindal is the goddamn POSTER BOY for the party of stupid. And frankly I’m still baffled by the story that he took the name “Bobby” because of the Brady Bunch. Not Greg? What an idiot. That’s like picking Cindy instead of Marcia!

Thought you might like to know that Allegro Medical is offering special pricing for a limited time on suppositories and purple suppository inserter applicators. JUST IN TIME FOR HANUKKAH ... surprise your friends and relatives with the products they love most. And they’re perfect for that holiday grab-bag at the office!

Thank you for reading this!

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