L’Shanah Tovah, y’all.

To celebrate the dawn of another new year I’d like to wish all of my Jewish readers — friends, relatives and total strangers — a sweet and happy 5780 from Howdygram headquarters. And here’s my annual Rosh Hashanah graphic!

Unfortunately, I woke up this morning feeling like 100% TOTAL CRAP. This included: 1) nasal congestion, a runny nose and a “phlegmy” cough; 2) pressure in my chest and an inability to belch; 3) nausea; 4) watery eyes; 5) sporadic stomach cramps; and 6) a 99° fever, which is high for me. Fortunately, when Sam got home from his walk at 7 a.m. he helped me fight back with a variety of medications, including FloNase for the congestion and allergy symptoms, Hydrocodone with Tylenol, Xanax to help me calm down and relieve my chest pressure, and a teeny prescription pill for the nausea.

My goal today is to get rid of complaints 1, 2, 3, 4, 6 and 7. I’ll worry about number 5 (stomach cramps) later.

---

For your possible interest I thought it might be fun to share today’s fresh grocery order from Wal-Mart, which will be ready for pickup at 11 a.m. (Eventually I’m hoping to eat something today … even if it’s just a stupid can of soup.)

• Hormel Compleats Chili with Beans
• Great Value Whole Milk
• Campbell’s Tomato Soup
• Great Value Extra Noodle Chicken Soup Mix
• Cheesecake Factory Raspberry Cheesecake (one slice, and it’s all mine)
• HomeStyle Harvest Twice Baked Potatoes
• The Pioneer Woman Grilled Southwest Marinated Chicken Breasts
• Bob Evans Sour Cream & Chive Mashed Potatoes
• Deli Potato Salad 
• Deli Macaroni Salad
• Carl Buddig Chicken Lunch Meat
• Crystal Light Berry-Pomagranate Drink Mix
• Crystal Light Peach Iced Tea Drink Mix

Yes, dear readers, in case you didn’t know, Wal-Mart sells frozen Cheesecake Factory cheesecake by-the-slice! I found it online completely by accident this morning and decided to order a slice of raspberry cheesecake as a splurge. (White chocolate shavings and swirly whipped cream are not included.)

Believe it or not, I’ve never had Cheesecake Factory’s cheesecake. I’ll write a detailed review* after I eat this thing today.

As promised, here’s my review of the Cheesecake Factory’s RASPBERRY CHEESECAKE: Phooey.

---

I snagged some wonderful graphics a few minutes ago from Creative Market’s weekly Monday freebies. The floral patterns will be excellent for tote bags and throw pillows in The Howdygram Store, and I’ll use the striped space-age backgrounds for greeting cards. I love free shit like this!

---

Time, as they say, marches on. It’s 11:12 p.m. and I just woke up from an extended nap that lasted approximately six hours, I think. Quite some time ago I had asked Sam for a twice-baked potato for dinner and woke up just now to find it sitting on the tray table in front of me … ice cold. It’s my own fault, though. At times like this Sam always tries to wake me up (whispering in my ear or kissing my head), but sometimes I can’t or don’t respond so he decides just to let me sleep. A couple of minutes ago I managed two bites of my ice cold potato, anyway, because I had to take some meds with food in my stomach. This was exceptionally unpleasant and I hope I don’t live to regret it.

Yes, occasionally I’m a drama queen. Deal with it. And thank you for reading this.