THE BIG STAMPEDE (1932) starring John Wayne. The Big Stampede is amazing due to how much it stinks. For instance, John Wayne can’t act, he runs like a girl, and he owns a horse named Duke who responds to complex sentences like “Duke! Swing by the ranch and get Jim-Bob, pick up my shirts at the laundry and get back here by 3:30 with a case of beer!” Even worse, at the beginning of the movie we see a wagon train in the middle of the desert trying to figure out if they want to settle in Arizona or New Mexico while the wagonmaster is standing under a signpost pointing in two directions with actual arrows. (I was also half-expecting a sign that said: “STUCKEY’S, NEXT EXIT.”)
THE SCARLET EMPRESS (1934) starring Marlene Dietrich is amazing for an altogether opposite reason. It’s probably the most visually breathtaking movie I’ve ever seen and it’s fascinating to watch. The Scarlet Empress tells the story of Russia’s Catherine the Great (Dietrich) who as a teenage girl was shlepped by her mother from Prussia to marry Peter III (Sam Jaffe) of Russia. He was barely 12 years old at the time. Catherine thoroughly despised Peter and wrote later in her diary that he was a “mental defective,” scarred permanently from smallpox, pale, childish, cruel, obnoxious to his staff and still played with clay and toy soldiers. Sam Jaffe was fabulous in that part and scares the living crap out of you.
The movie follows Catherine’s string of lovers (especially Count Alexei, played by John Lodge), her battles with Peter’s controlling aunt, court intrigue, and her eventual coup d’état of the entire government and Peter’s death, probably at Catherine’s decree. GREAT STUFF! The set designs are exquisite, perverse, over-the-top and nightmare-inducing. I could watch this movie a million times. (I might. It’s stored on our DVR.)
The movie follows Catherine’s string of lovers (especially Count Alexei, played by John Lodge), her battles with Peter’s controlling aunt, court intrigue, and her eventual coup d’état of the entire government and Peter’s death, probably at Catherine’s decree. GREAT STUFF! The set designs are exquisite, perverse, over-the-top and nightmare-inducing. I could watch this movie a million times. (I might. It’s stored on our DVR.)
Ooh … Sam and I enjoyed some out-of-town visitors on Monday and Tuesday! My adorable cousin Karen (our fathers were brothers) and her husband Ron flew in from the Detroit area just to see us, and it was AMAZING AND WONDERFUL … a family reunion of the highest caliber! I hadn’t seen Karen for about 30 years; Sam had never met her at all. We bonded, gossiped, laughed, cried, choked up, reminisced and talked until we were hoarse. I loved every minute of it. We don’t have company very often — not counting the hospice nursing staff and a C.N.A. on bath days — so it takes a lot of physical and emotional energy for us to “entertain” like that. It was joyous, but as soon as Karen and Ron left for the airport yesterday Sam and I practically passed out for 12 hours.
I’m ready to do this all over again. Visitors are definitely welcome.
In case you’re wondering … yes, I was feeling well while Karen and Ron were here. It was a gift from my guardian angel, because I wanted to have a memorable visit with them and didn’t want to lie here struggling with a shitty health crisis, which happens often, such as a heat rash attack, choking on food or throwing up, a very low or very high body temperature, and so on. (I did have a mild digestive problem when I woke up on Tuesday, but it was a couple of hours before Karen and Ron came over and I felt fine by the time they got here.)
I need to get some sleep now. Thank you for reading this and please remember the Alamo.
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