That was one hell of a nap, people. FIVE HOURS. And for a change nothing woke me up ... NOTHING, not even FedEx ringing the doorbell with a package from
Wal-Mart or a goddamn birding tweeting under the arbor on our patio. God bless naps! GOD BLESS RETIREMENT!
Also God bless Sam, because after work today he tried to go to Costco but turned back after I checked traffic for him online and discovered THREE FUCKING ACCIDENTS on I-30 and every westbound lane was shut down across Lake Ray Hubbard. And if you can’t get across Lake Ray Hubbard, boys and girls, you might as well just
kill yourself because there are no other options unless you own a helicopter.
For your possible interest the following map indicates: A) Howdygram headquarters; B) Costco in Rockwall at I-30 and route 205; and C) our Wal-Mart Neighborhoood Market. The black circles denote the rush-hour wrecks that ruined my chances for a rotisserie chicken.
But wait ...
there’s more! With Costco out of the picture I asked Sam if he’d drive over to the Wal-Mart Neighborhoood Market on Town East Boulevard instead because they have hamburger buns and decent alternate rotisserie chickens when you can’t get to Costco, except when he got inside the store, which was a TOTAL CHAOS, the only chickens left were
garlic/lemon — garlic is not allowed in our house UNCONTROLLABLE BELCHING — and the do-it-yourself checkout lanes were out of service and Sam refused to stand in line for half an hour just to buy a bag of buns. So he came home.
Without a chicken.
In case you’re wondering, NO, Sam and I don’t plan to waste our time watching Donald Trump’s speech tonight at the Republican National Convention. We’ll get a nice recap tomorrow from Rachel Maddow (we love her) at MSNBC with video clips.
This is the death of the Republican Party, guys. The GOP finally has the candidate it deserves, a frightening right-wing psychopath supported by the KKK who can’t wait to start World War III over immigrants and “bad trade deals.”
Be afraid. Be VERY afraid.
Thank you for reading this. I really, really have to eat dinner now.
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