Wednesday, April 11, 2018

My fever’s gone, I’m peeing successfully in the commode bucket and I think I want to go to bed. Right now.

TUESDAY, 10:15 P.M., 4/10/2018. I sincerely regret that I didn’t start this post hours ago. I wanted to, but I couldn’t. Yesterday my primary care physician recommended a series of physical therapy sessions at home to help me start walking again without using my walker, and said she would refer me to Physicians’ Choice Homecare. And so she did … almost immediately.

First thing this morning I got a call from Physicians’ Choice, and at 3 p.m. they sent over a very nice R.N. named Brenda to evaluate my health in excruciating detail, prepare a complete list of my prescription medications and assess my physical abilities by watching me shlep to and fro in the family room. As soon as Brenda left — sometime around 4:30-ish — Sam and I conked out for a juicy four-hour nap, sleeping through The Quiet Man (1952) starring John Wayne, Maureen O’Hara and Victor McLaglen, half an episode of “People’s Court” and The Talk of the Town (1942) starring Ronald Colman, Jean Arthur and Cary Grant.

Now I’m watching Calamity Jane (1953) starring Doris Day and Howard Keel. (It’s a full life.)

He’s sure at the end of his rope, isn’t he? Suffocating on all sides by scandals, conspiracies, lies, obstruction, halfwit White House aides, security leaks, porn stars, and on and on … Asshole-in-Chief Donald Trump has never been closer to: 1) impeachment; 2) resignation; 3) a brain hemorrhage; 4) his third divorce; or 5) blindness ... as demonstrated below.

America’s Asshole-in-Chief stares into the sun during last year’s solar eclipse.

WEDNESDAY, 10:43 P.M., 4/11/2018. Holy shit, today was an atrocious day! After a pleasant early morning meeting with another home health agency (Debra from Comfort Keepers), I descended into a major afternoon/early evening health crisis that included: 1) a spiking fever; 2) uncontrollable urination; and 3) scaring Sam half to death because he was ready to call 911.

At the moment I definitely feel better … my fever’s gone, I’m peeing successfully in the commode bucket and I think I want to go to bed. RIGHT NOW.

Thank you for reading this.

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