Wednesday, April 13, 2016

Oy. The Lucky Charms leprechaun is dead.

It’s 6 p.m. and I just ate lunch. No, seriously ... I JUST ATE LUNCH! And there are three excellent reasons how come: 1) I showered today at 1 p.m. and then conked out for a nap in the family room as soon as I dried off and Sam replaced the dressing on my pressure sores; 2) I woke up around 5:15; and 3) I wasn’t really hungry until now.

At this hour I’m also dizzy, achy and slightly cranky but I have every confidence that I’ll make a full recovery as soon as I take more drugs. Thank you for your concern.

Just in case you haven’t paid attention to the advancing age of your favorite blogger — i.e., yours truly — I will be 65 years old on November 1, thereby qualifying for Medicare for the first time in my entire life. This is what’s known as a “Holy Shit Moment” even though basic enrollment in Medicare Part A (Hospitalization) is automatic because I’m already retired and already receive a monthly Social Security check. Therefore I will only have to concern myself with Medicare Part B (Medical), Part C (Medicare Advantage Plans/Medigap) and Part D (Prescription Drugs).

The good news is, although I’m a total Einstein about Medicare right now I’ve been reading buckets of literature from the Social Security Administration and I’m practically positive I won’t have to worry about Medicare Parts C through D as long as Sam is still employed and I’m covered by his Blue Cross plan. Sam promised to call his benefits guru at work to verify what’s what.

It’s hell getting old. So to distract myself in the meantime I just ordered two canisters of the best product on earth: MANISCHEWITZ MATZO FARFEL. The lowest price on the Internet was from at $3.82 each with surprisingly cheap shipping. (Amazon sells six for $37.75 and Wal-Mart has them for $24.60. Nobody should spend that kind of money on matzo farfel.)

I’ve got some weird and grievous news tonight as the Howdygram acknowledges the death of another celebrity. Arthur Anderson, a versatile Broadway, movie and radio actor best known (unfortunately) as the voice of Lucky Charms leprechaun, died last weekend at age 93.
It’s not every day that we’re asked to mourn the passing of a breakfast cereal icon! Anderson is survived by Cap’n Crunch, Tony the Tiger and Count Chocula, who will all participate as celebrity pallbearers. Spoons and low-fat milk will be distributed at the funeral at no charge.

Yup ... I’ve got a few more new EXCELLENT FREE FONTS tonight! I’m goddamn happy with the whole bunch of ’em, to tell you the truth, but especially “Lazy Spring Day” and those cute little “Rough Vignettes” ornaments. Take a look below the graphic if you want download links, okay?

I’m not feeling very well and I might have to sign off earlier than I expected tonight. We’re surrounded by rainy weather, my joints are stiff as a board, I’m slightly queasy, I think I’ve got that low body temperature bullshit going on again and my head hurts. Therefore I think I’ll relocate into the family room (again) and shoot for another nice nap before Sam gets home from work. Thank you for understanding ... and thank you for reading this!

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