I’m choking and gagging and coughing violently. Having a wonderful time.

Hi-de-ho, everybody! It’s the early hours of Tuesday morning — 3:25 a.m. to be exact — and I thought it might be a good idea to distract myself by composing another Howdygram post even though I’m feeling ONE THOUSAND PERCENT LOUSY right now. This is wholly due to: 1) my body temperature is only 94.7°; 2) I’ve got drippy allergy symptoms; 3) my knees are killing me; 4) my bedtime meds are burning a foul-tasting hole in my esophagus because they didn’t “go down” all the way when I swallowed them three hours ago and immediately fell asleep; and 5) Sam went to bed at midnight so there’s nobody to play with.

I’m fucking miserable.

Click here to view a detailed explanation of our Shit-O-Meter numbers.

The bottom line? I need a couple of Otter Pops immediately to help with the prescription meds dissolving in my throat. Lemonade isn’t cutting it, and I can’t stress enough how horrible this is! I’m choking, I’m gagging and I’m coughing violently, my throat feels like somebody set it on fire, and the taste in my mouth right now is absolutely VILE.

Other than that, I’m having a wonderful time here.

Thank you for reading this. More to come.