I’m doing yams tomorrow for our Annual Festival of Leftovers.

It’s Thursday, November 24 — Thanksgiving 2016 — but it’s a little too early to start thinking about what time to throw our bird in the oven as it’s only 4:30 a.m. and I’ve got Hormel Compleats meatloaf and mashed potatoes in the microwave on my desk. I’m starving. I briefly considered a couple of pretzel rods but desperately wanted something with gravy. A nice portrait of the aforementioned meatloaf appears below.

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Many happy returns of the day, people, and I hope you’re having a goddamn wonderful holiday with all your favorite side dishes! Sam and I haven’t exactly decided what time we want to eat  today (it depends on our afternoon nap schedule) but I’m guessing we’ll start cooking at 4 p.m. and eat around 6. Our menu this year includes a frozen Jennie-O turkey breast, stuffing with lots of ’shrooms, a spinach soufflé for yours truly, whole berry cranberry sauce for Sam and voluminous gravy. I briefly considered making sugar-free canned yams today, too, but I think that’s way too much food. I’ll do the yams tomorrow instead for our Annual Festival of Leftovers. 

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Let’s give thanks for the exciting selection of free fonts I found for you today! “Ganges Slab” is especially thrilling because you get nine basic weights with an oblique style and italics for each of them. That’s 27 fonts!  (FYI, the “Ganges Slab” family is currently selling on MyFonts.com for $190.) Another juicy favorite today is “Bauru,” which has an elegant art deco vibe and teeny little serifs. I’m not usually a fan of art deco fonts but I’ll definitely make an exception for this one.

Download links appear below the graphic in case you want any of these for your own collection. And here’s a HOT TIP: You should consider giving free fonts as hostess gifts during the holidays. Just tie them to a bottle of wine with a fancy-ass ribbon. (You’re welcome.)

Wagoon • Enlighten • Ganges Slab • Ardilla • Pathout • Honilad • Bauru

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Megalomaniacal rapper Kanye West — the fashion icon wannabe, potential 2020 presidential candidate and the third (and current) husband of Kim Kardashian — had a shrieking meltdown a few days ago during a concert in Sacramento that eventually landed him in the psych ward at UCLA Medical Center in Los Angeles ... handcuffed to a stretcher. Because being Kanye West is some scary, fucked-up shit. And I’m pretty sure he’s bi-polar.

The Kardashians are miserable that Kanye won’t be home to share their bird on Thanksgiving but promised they’d all get together as soon as he’s released to count their money, show off their new ass implants and buy bigger houses. Please remember them in your prayers today, okay?

I’m kidding, guys.

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At this point I should publish my Howdygram post and take a nice afternoon nap so I can help Sam with Thanksgiving dinner prep, which is scheduled to get underway around 4 p.m. I even typed up a schedule in case we get confused.

Thank you for reading this. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.