Friday, October 21, 2016

Everybody likes a friendly feel now and then, right?

Hello, howdy-do, shalom and how’s the family from your friends at Howdygram headquarters! It’s 3 a.m. and I’m waiting for a line of thunderstorms to roll through here. I’m not holding my breath, however, because is run by lying sacks of poo, and the bulk of the rain — which should have been here THREE HOURS AGO — is still hovering northeast of Abilene. The teeny red star on the following map denotes Howdygram headquarters. Wave to me. It gets lonely here in the middle of the night. (Thank you.)

Before I move on to other topics of interest I’ve got some strange FREE FONTS for you this morning. Frankly I’m not especially wild about any of them except for “Carissa Wellington,” which looks like it’s written with a leaky fountain pen. (Sam’s favorite font here is “Pirates.”) Please note that “Winterfall Duo” is included in the same file as “Rosemary Feuille” for no reason whatsoever, and “Freight Round Pro” offers six pleasant weights with italics for each and nicely-rounded edges for a friendly feel. (Everybody likes a friendly feel now and then, right?) Necessary download links will appear after the graphic so you can add all of these to your own personal collection.

I’ve got a juicy announcement for you, people. Please continue reading!
Therefore, beginning November 2 Sam will enjoy two or more months of well-earned leisure time at home — sleep, eat bagels, watch “Andy Griffith” reruns on our new 60-inch TV, rinse and repeat — and then decide sometime after the first of the year if he wants to look for a STRESS-FREE DREAM JOB that will pick up the cost of his health insurance until he’s old enough for Medicare in 2024.

STRESS-FREE DREAM JOBS, EXPLAINED. We are not ruling out any of the following: 1) dog grooming; 2) arranging deli platters at Tom Thumb with parsley; 3) Costco customer service dude; 4) part-time apprentice gynecologist; and 5) front-desk supervisor for a small print shop.

I guess it’s needless to add that I’m FUCKING THRILLED about all this. I retired three years ago (I was a freelance website designer) and now I’ll finally have some company around here and a lunch buddy. Also a person to fill my thermal tumbler thing with ice two or three times a day.

Here’s another graphic before I take my second nap of the day. It’s not that I’m tired, actually ... I’m just having a rather severe skin pain hoo-hah on the back of my left thigh that feels like I’m sitting on a third degree burn, and the only time the pain stops is when I’m stretched out on the chaise in the family room watching old movies. So that’s exactly where I’m headed! 

Tomorrow is a big day around here. Ashley Furniture is delivering our new coffee table and media console between 11 a.m. and 3 p.m. and our gigantic new Samsung TV from Costco will get here between 12 and 4 p.m. Sam has a lot of prep work to do tonight after dinner, such as dismantling our old TV and media stand. My participation will be limited to project supervision from a safe distance with snacks.

Thanks a million for reading this. Tell your friends, okay?

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