Sunday, February 25, 2018

From what I can tell, about 65% of NBC’s televised prime-time Olympics coverage has been about snowboarding.

Hi-de-ho, people. It’s another cold, wet day in north Texas. We’ve got a full day of storms and heavy rain in the forecast … and the fun is expected to start around 10 a.m. (two hours from now) after Sam swings by our polling place to take care of his early voting responsibilities. (It’s the Democratic primary for the November election.)

Thursday, February 22, 2018

Creativity, thunderstorms, new fonts … and that asshole is still in the White House.

You have to forgive me. I’ve been a little too wrapped up in my other addiction — greeting card design — for the last seven days and really haven’t set aside any extra time to write a Howdygram post. However I did put all that “design time” to good use. I created about 14 new cards for The Howdygram Store, including two new collections … “Me and the Cat” and some pretty soft-touch watercolor landscapes.

Thursday, February 15, 2018

Aljona Savchenko and Bruno Massot of Germany demonstrate the crowd-pleasing “flying crotch.”

Happy Thursday morning to you and yours! We’re experiencing a highly pleasant (and well-deserved) balmy pre-spring day here with an expected high around 80°. Following an unusually long Texas winter (three months!) with temperatures that rarely rose above 40°, Sam is so fucking happy he’s planning to go for a walk at one of his favorite parks followed by a quick trip to Wal-Mart for saltines, Claussen dill pickles and a bottle of low-dose aspirin. I’ll hold down the fort here at home because I’m a handicapped and housebound senior citizen. (I’m actually okay with this.)

Monday, February 12, 2018

I apologize for my absence last week.

Yo, shalom, howdy and happy Monday from Howdygram headquarters! It’s another cold and cloudy day here, following three months of more cold and cloudy days. Texas is definitely sick of winter. Yesterday we even had a small ICE STORM, which melted by mid-day due to a brief period of sunshine and an afternoon high that hit 50°. We’re all looking ahead to Wednesday with a high in the 60s and a steady spring warm-up every day thereafter. We even have thunderstorms in the forecast. At last!

Tuesday, February 6, 2018

A big Wal-Mart order, a visit from my HouseCalls medical team and our brand new feature, Let’s Learn Yiddish!

The stock market finally had an “up” day today — thank God! — so I’m feeling cheerful enough to suck* on an Atkins energy bar and write a quick Howdygram post. I’ll break the good financial news to Sam when he’s through with his afternoon nap.

Monday, February 5, 2018

Take care of your teeth … you’ll miss ’em when they’re gone.

It’s a bitter cold and overcast Monday morning here at Howdygram headquarters … about 34° with plenty of clouds. Tonight it will drop to freezing; tomorrow we’re expecting significant thunderstorms. This is an excellent situation, and I’m not complaining because we really need rain around here. Bring it on!

Friday, February 2, 2018

I am now living, breathing combination of Walter Brennan and Sylvester the Cat.

Hi-de-ho and happy Friday morning to you and yours! Sam is picking up a few grocery essentials at Wal-Mart — hummus, cheese, chicken lunch meat, braunschweiger, and a nice loaf of bread — while I hold down the proverbial fort here at Howdygram headquarters. And I also want to thank you in advance for putting up with me, as I’ve had a very difficult month bouncing back from another health scare (cellulitis in my right leg), a two-week fever and hospitalization at Baylor’s nearby medical center in Sunnyvale. As a result I’ve had almost zero energy whatsoever, a shitty appetite, a lot of difficulty moving around in the house, and I’ve even had to go back to using my walker so I won’t fall down.