Happy Thursday and hi-de-ho from Howdygram headquarters, which actually consists of one housebound editrix (me) in hot and sticky north Texas. I will verify that statement with the following authentic screen shot from Weather.com. Yes, boys and girls, it’s a FUCKING INFERNO down here, and we’re entering a dreaded Triple-Digit Zone that typically runs through mid-September. Yee-haw, right?
Thursday, June 30, 2016
Wednesday, June 29, 2016
Just in case you’re wondering how my doctor appointment turned out yesterday, the round-trip excursion on Mesquite’s ritzy senior citizen transport bus with a wheelchair elevator was absolutely fine, my visit with Dr. M was absolutely fine also, and I don’t have to go back for SIX MONTHS. Six months! I’ve been seeing her quarterly for about seven years so this is definitely a break from tradition.
Monday, June 27, 2016
Sunday, June 26, 2016
Happy Sunday, boys and girls! After spending the last day and a half working on a large number of adorable lunch box designs for The Howdygram Store (stop laughing!) I decided it was high time for a blog post covering the juicy news of the day. And here I am!
Friday, June 24, 2016
Hey. Wondering where I’ve been for the last few days? I have a one-word answer: RIGHT HERE! (Okay, two words.) However I haven’t posted anything to the Howdygram because I was very busy working on projects for The Howdygram Store ... such as our new adorable wireless mice that coordinate with all of our mousepad designs! This involved a great deal of work, believe it or not, including: 1) designing artwork for 45 mice; 2) saving the aforementioned artwork as high-resolution PNG files; 3) uploading the artwork to Zazzle and creating each wireless mouse one-by-one; 4) writing product descriptions; 5) assigning a store category; 6) embedding search key words; and 7) I can’t think of anything else.
Tuesday, June 21, 2016
Hi and howdy-do from Texas, y’all. I’ll begin with a simple statement: I’M NOT HAVING SUCH A GREAT DAY. While I’m not exactly in any actual pain, per se (see my official Shit-O-Meter readout, below), I do feel extremely lousy due to 24 hours of unhappy intestinal issues, chills and body aches from a low-grade fever, and — saving the best for last — an overactive, uncontrollable bladder that has me “marking territory” as I speed-shlep to the closest bathroom. As I said, I’m not having a great day. Not at all.
Monday, June 20, 2016
Okay, so here’s the thing. In an effort to take a brief break from politics I didn’t think I wanted to write a Howdygram post tonight but — surprise! surprise! — I just changed my mind at the very last minute. It’s 11:23 p.m. and I’ll just keep on typing until my brain runs out of bullshit. (Actually, that could take a while.)
Sunday, June 19, 2016
Happy Sunday night from hot and sweaty north Texas! It’s 81° at 11 p.m., I’m showered, fed and rested, Sam is outside in his slippers shuffling back and forth in front of the house, and I actually tried to start this post hours and hours ago — before lunch, actually! — but never really got into it. Therefore I’m way too late wishing everybody a happy Father’s Day, in case you’re a father. Here’s my annual celebratory graphic just for the hell of it.
Saturday, June 18, 2016
Wednesday, June 15, 2016
Happy Wednesday night, people. If you haven’t been watching the televised event of the year, you’re missing a fantastic filibuster in the United States Senate! Senator Chris Murphy (D-CT) began this morning at 11:20 a.m. and it seems that he’s working with a tag-team of two other senators, bouncing back and forth with pre-arranged “questions” and “answers,” which is actually a very clever strategy: Cory Booker (D-NJ) and Dick Durbin (D-IL). Other participants have included Elizabeth Warren and Edward Markey (D-MA), Richard Blumenthal (D-NJ), Dianne Feinstein (D-CA), Ben Nelson (D-FL) and Charles Schumer (D-NY). Democrats from the House of Represenatives have been delivering “care packages” all day (mostly Red Bull, soft drinks and snacks) to keep the senators going.
Tuesday, June 14, 2016
Sunday, June 12, 2016
Oy, I AM SO FUCKING SICK OF THIS SHIT. Our latest national tragedy features another angry lunatic with a machine gun, this time in a crowded LGBT night club in Orlando. So far 50 are dead and 53 injured, and authorities are calling it the worst mass murder in our country’s history. Once again the Republican shitweasels in Congress have proved their everlasting devotion to the NRA.
It’s 2:30 Saturday afternoon but I have to begin this post with a hearty GOOD MORNING! because I woke up less than an hour ago due to being completely upside-down, sleep-wise. I was conked out on the chaise in the family room until 3:45 this morning, dragged myself into the study to take the bedtime pills and insulin injection I’d forgotten the night before, and then decided to sit around and finish designing a thrilling new line of tranquility-themed greeting cards and snazzy padfolios for The Howdygram Store on Zazzle (see below). For your possible interest, this new collection of greeting cards (10 different designs so far) is NOT what you expect because the sentiments inside are definitely not tranquil in any way whatsoever. Thank you.
Thursday, June 9, 2016
Hi, guys. I considered skipping today’s Howdygram post for one reason and one reason only: I can’t think of anything to write, not counting the following potential subjects: 1) I’m heading into another battle with Dr. M’s office regarding why the fuck don’t they respond to prescription refill requests; 2) if you’ve never tried Hormel Compleats’ Chicken Breast with Mashed Potatoes and Gravy you’re in for a glorious surprise; 3) I’ve got seven more new free fonts for you; and 4) my Clots “R” Us Do-It-Yourself Blood Clot Clinic was open for business this afternoon.
Wednesday, June 8, 2016
Hi-do-ho and happy Wednesday to you and yours! The world’s most adorable husband just got home from his weekly Costco excursion, and while Sam (the aforementioned adorable husband) refills our refrigerator with teeny tacos and assorted other whatnots I thought this might be a fine time to dive into today’s Howdygram post.
Tuesday, June 7, 2016
Friday, June 3, 2016
Hi, people. Did you miss me yesterday? I wanted to write a Howdygram post but got caught up designing a thundering herd of new mousepads for The Howdygram Store, my number one favorite new addiction as a retired graphic artist. Not only does this provide an ongoing creative outlet for me, I also earn a few bucks in royalties whenever Zazzle sells my products. MONEY IS TERRIFIC. Stay tuned ... I’ll share a few of my new designs later in this post.
Wednesday, June 1, 2016
Happy first day of June, boys and girls! I’ve decided to squeeze in this Howdygram post between all the heavy thunderstorms and pounding rain we didn’t get, thanks to the lying sacks of poo at Weather.com who wouldn’t recognize a heavy thunderstorm if it blew into town wearing a goddamn name tag. What a bunch of fucking idiots. When I went to bed last night we were expecting four hours of severe weather starting at 6:45 a.m. — FOUR HOURS! — and we got exactly nothing.